Coping Skills for Holiday Stress
We all need coping skills for holiday stress this time of year!
“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas…”
- overwhelm
- overeating
- overspending
- anxiety
- grief
- sadness
Insert a word for how the holidays make you feel. For some of us holidays mean excitement and joy. For others of us, we might be feeling a little “bah humbug” with the added stresses that arise during the holiday season.
By November, we have long forgotten the New Year’s resolutions and have given way to sweets and treats without the ample time to exercise or the extra money to invest in self-care practices. Our lives become inundated with gatherings, parties, and shopping all pressured by deadlines, responsibilities, and expectations. A 2022 study by Sesame, a company that provides accessible healthcare, found that 2 in 5 Americans felt the holidays negatively impacted their mental health. Many reported an increase in anxiety and depression as well as financial strain during the holidays. Read on to see more on coping skills for holiday stress!
Holiday Stressors
*Seasonal depression (Seasonal Affective Disorder – SAD); cooler temperatures and shorter days trigger a chemical change in the brain. The body creates more melatonin, a hormone that assists in sleep, and the body receives less Vitamin D from sunlight making us feel fatigued and moody.
*Financial Strain; increased spending on gifts, food, and social gatherings results in less money spent on self-care practices. Consumption-based society and “keeping up with the Joneses” mentality means we will spend more money during the holidays than any other time of year.
*Poor diet and busy schedules; an increase in consumption of high fat and sugary foods during the holidays coupled with an increase in social activities means less time at the gym and fewer healthy home-cooked meals. Out of our regular routine, we tend to lose sight of what we value and reach for what is easy.
*Family time; when around family we tend to regress, no matter how many years we have spent away from our childhood home. Heated conversations over political and religious views. Triggers such as familiar smells or sounds that bring up unpleasant memories can result in an increase of anger, fear, and overwhelm. This triggers a mental regression causing us to return to old habits and ingrained behaviors that lead to coping mechanisms like alcohol, drugs or overeating.
*Grief and loss; anyone who has lost someone is challenged during the holidays. Grief has no predictable timeline and the holidays can trigger an onset of overwhelm or depression that comes when least expected. There is a lot of pressure to “be happy” despite common feelings of loneliness or isolation. Our energy is depleted trying to put on a happy face to avoid judgement, questions, or being told how we should feel at this stage of grief.
As a yoga therapist, I have worked one-on-one with many clients to overcome these strains on mental health during the holidays and throughout the year. Yoga has an incredible ability to keep our mental health in check during stressful periods of life. Most of us in America see yoga as a physical wellness practice, but this would be misleading. While movement is a key component to our mental and physical health it is just one piece of yoga. Yoga in its entirety is an ancient lifestyle of discipline and mindfulness.
Yoga Therapy is a practice of holistic health tailored to the individuals needs and goals, that uses the discipline of yoga to create a more mindful and healthier lifestyle in mind, body, and spirit.
Coping Skills
These are coping skills for holiday stress found in the teachings of yoga. I use these with my clients in private yoga therapy programs. These skillsets help them cope with holiday stress and beyond.
Set Boundaries: Practice the yogic discipline of non-harming. Know your limits. Limit who you spend time with and how much. Just because you are related or love them doesn’t mean you need their negativity to rub off. Also, it’s ok to say no! You don’t have to say yes to every event, invitation, or volunteer opportunity. Pick the things that mean the most to you and focus your energy there.
Reserve Your Energy: Yoga teaches us to expend our energy where it is most useful. Is where you are directing your energy now hurtful or helpful? Consider what current tasks are draining your vitality and either delegate by asking for help or let it go completely. Be aware of how your energy feels around certain people. When doing certain activities are exhausting, decide how to cultivate a life that isn’t energy draining, but a life that serves you well!
Feel Your Feelings: Yoga teaches us to be truthful. You don’t have to be dishonest with yourself or others. Your feelings are meant to be felt and expressed. Give yourself ample opportunity to be present with what you are feeling. Reach out for help with a trusted person in your life if you need to talk it through.
Maintain Reasonable Expectations: The yogic skill of non-attachment is the ability to enjoy the journey by living in the present moment. Let go of the worry that the meal you are making or the gift you are buying won’t be good enough. Instead remain in the present moment with the task at hand. Enjoy the process of cooking, shopping, and being with loved ones. Free yourself of the expectations that it needs to top last year or impress others. If you have never been able to impress your mother-in-law with your sweet potato pie, you probably never will, so let that expectation go!
More Coping Skills for Holiday Stress
Have an Attitude of Gratitude: Very few of us can be unhappy when we think of all the things for which we are grateful. Contentment, a discipline in yoga that allows us to accept and appreciate what we have, helps us to resist the habit to focus on what could be better or compare yourself or situation to others. Searching for happiness outside of yourself whether it’s through relationships, substances, or objects, will always lead to discontentment.
Practice Self-Care: The skill of self-discipline in yoga is the ability to stick to your routine even when you are busy. That means being able to maintain some of your healthy habits like exercise, healthy food choices, time for quiet reflection, or meditation and prayer. Yoga also teaches us about our inner wisdom. This is the ability to recognize when we are tired and need to rest. And the ability to feel when we are full and stop eating, or to go to yoga class knowing we will feel better if we do. That same inner wisdom helps us to see negativity, old habits or thought patterns for what they are. Self-discipline assists us in releasing those things we no longer want or need in our life.
Just Breathe: Something as simple as breathing practices can be a great way to regulate our nervous system. The next time you feel overwhelmed, stressed, anxious, or depressed try focusing on your breath. Pause for a moment, feel your feet on the ground and notice your breath. Allow your breath to slow and deepen. One of my favorite breathing techniques is called box breath. Try it: Inhale for a count of 4, retain your breath for a count of 4, exhale for a count of 4, and then remain empty for a count of 4. Repeat until you feel calmer and more grounded. Follow along with the video on my Youtube channel!
Take Time to Rest: We live in a busy society and rest is seen as negative or lazy. However, rest is vital to our wellness. The downfall of the holidays is that very few of us find the time for respite, despite its importance to our immune and nervous systems health. Yoga teaches us that with rest we have the ability to withdraw from the outside world. Through the yogic skill of concentration, we take a moment to focus on the present. In the quiet of the present moment, peace becomes easy. Try it: Focus on your breath. Set your gaze upon on an object or close your eyes. Repeat the mantra, “I am here” for a few moments and notice how you feel. Do you feel calmer? Is your mind less scattered? Are you more focused? Never meditated? Try guided meditations with me for free on Insight Timer App.
Surrender to What Is: There are many things outside of our control; relationships, weather, illness, the grocery store sold out of pumpkin. We have been programmed to try to control every situation and letting go isn’t easy. The ancient yoga teaching of surrender, is the path to our peace. It is one of the most difficult practices of yoga. Surrendering is not weakness; it is strength in knowing when we need to change course or go with the flow in various areas of life. Surrender is knowing when we need to bend, so we don’t break.
Get Help
You are not alone in the process. If you need someone to guide you through this journey to better health and for coping skills for holiday stress, please reach out. Waterfall Yoga can help. Click the links for pricing, scheduling, classes, retreats and group events with Waterfall Yoga Therapy.
